What is my penis hitting when I have vaginal sex?

Dear Curious about her body, 

From what you’re describing, it sounds like your penis is most likely hitting your girlfriend’s cervix during penetration. It may be helpful to know about how the cervix moves during arousal and throughout the menstrual cycle. That said, it could also be a number of other potential reasons that explain what your girlfriend is feeling. One of the most important considerations is whether this feels okay for your girlfriend. Read on to gain some in depth knowledge about this topic. 

What can affect the location of someone’s cervix? 

The cervix is located at the top of the vagina and acts as a sort of barrier between the vagina and the uterus. It may be possible for your girlfriend to feel her cervix with her finger. It’s also possible to touch the cervix with your penis during sex. There are many factors that can affect how the cervix moves in the body.  

Arousal can trigger the cervix to move up, creating more space in the vagina for penetration. This process is sometimes referred to as “tenting.” If your girlfriend isn’t fully aroused, her cervix may be slightly lower in her body. The lower the cervix, the more likely it is for the penis to push against the cervix during sex.  

Another factor to consider is the menstrual cycle. The cervix changes positions during the menstrual cycle. Around ovulation, it moves higher to help sperm travel into the uterus. During the luteal phase and through menstruation, the cervix drops down and is lower in the body. The menstrual cycle can also influence a person’s interest in sex and ability to become aroused. So, it’s possible that your girlfriend may notice your penis hitting her cervix depending on where she’s at in her cycle.  

How can I communicate and support my partner around this topic? 

The fact that you’re curious about her body and looking for answers shows that you care about her experience! Along those lines, you may consider asking her questions about how this type of deep penetration and cervical stimulation feels for her. You might consider asking: 

• Does it feel good? 
• Does it hurt or feel uncomfortable when this occurs? 
• Does this happen every time we have sex or just sometimes?  

The cervix can be a very sensitive part of the body. For some people, cervical stimulation feels really good and can lead to orgasm. For others, it’s extremely uncomfortable and even painful. It can be a good idea to have an open and honest conversation with your girlfriend about how it feels for her. Her answers may shed some light on how to have a pleasurable experience for both of you. 

Should I be concerned if my penis is hitting her cervix? 

The short answer is no, unless it’s causing her pain and discomfort. One main function of the cervix is to protect the uterus. Cervical stimulation is sometimes called “cervical penetration.” However, it’s impossible to penetrate the cervix during sex.  

If the pressure against her cervix is painful or uncomfortable, it can be worth trying other options that may feel better. For example: 

• Try different positions. Changing the angle of penetration may be more comfortable for your girlfriend. 
• Take it slow. For some people, slower and more gentle sex may make cervical stimulation more enjoyable.  
• Don’t forget about foreplay! Making sure your girlfriend is fully aroused before penetration can increase enjoyment for everyone involved.  
• Try other types of sex. Such as oral sex or masturbating together can change things up and may even introduce new types of pleasure. 

If your girlfriend has pain, bleeding, or discharge that seems unusual, she may want to consider seeing a health care provider. Regular checkups, including Pap tests and cervical exams, can help make sure everything is healthy. 

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Hopefully this cleared up some confusion for you and your girlfriend. Curiosity and communication about what feels good for both of you can help you build an exciting and pleasurable sex life.  

Your friend,